My name is Joanna and I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at the age of 22. Other than having diabetes I am also an athlete, student, girlfriend, swimcoach, receptionist, boardmember, avid baker, and the list goes on... Interested to learn more? - then read my blog why dont you ;)
This week has been a challange for me, overcoming pretty major things, in my opinion, has become sort of my specialty.. You who know me know what I'm talking about. However, type 1 diabetes is unlike any obstacle I've ever encounter in my life before. When my brother was dangerously sick many years ago, I could escape to swimming or school to get away from it all, if only just for a little moment. When I've gotten injured or ill during swim season I knew I could do something to change the situation, to make it better. When my grandmother died, I could once again take a deep dive into swimming or schoolwork to escape sorrow at times. However, there's no escaping this disease, it won't let me take even a couple of moments off. This is a fact that has recently become more obvious to me, as other things in my life situation has gotten slightly tougher. I know that the situation I'm in now, with an intense job search, being away from my boyfriend who supports me so much on a daily basis, and moving back to my home country and leaving many friends after being away for 4 years, these are all things that would have been a lot more manageable without my diabetes. This is the time when I wish my pancreas would just start working, if only for a day to let me take a breather. It has now dawned on me that it will not ever happen again, and I'm starting to deal with it. Accepting this is the biggest challenge of them all, and I don't know if type ones ever do? I mean how can you accept that something is controlling you for the rest of your life, how can you accept that almost every night you go to bed you have to worry about possibly getting low blood sugar and not waking up, resulting in an insulin coma. I am aware that if I manage my disease properly it won't have to feel like it's controlling me ALL the time, and potentially fatal events occurring would be rare. At the same time, managing diabetes is one of the hardest things there is, because the blood sugar is affected by so many different variable and the necessary insulin doses always changes. However, I hope that with time the worrying will settle as well as the panic about feeling like you're stuck in a small room with no chance of getting out, because that's what having diabetes feels like at times, almost suffocating.
The positive thing is, deep down I know I will get through this because I don't give up, I just need to allow myself to be weak at times, which I've learned is probably one of the most important things for staying strong (weird and contradicting I know, but so true). With that comes taking help, support, and sharing my story with others. No battles are won by a single person, neither will the battle of my life be... It's hard to realize that you are dependent on other people helping you to get through the day, however, now that I am working on that I am hopeful that with a lot of work and dedication by me, my life with diabetes will get better and easier. What I've been trying to do so far is more trying to push the diabetes out of the way, instead of realizing its unfortunally here to stay. But now I'm going to make an effort to accepting it. It will take some time, but I'm sure I'll get there one day!
That's all the deep thoughts I had for tonight!
Good night people
Kommentarer
Fanny säger:
Keep it up girl :) I know you will win this battle!
In November 2012 I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, in the middle of my last season as an elite swimmer at Cleveland State University, USA. This is my story of how I try to come to terms with that my survival will depend mainly on maintaining a good regime with taking insulin and blood glucose tests for the rest of my life. Since putting the competitive swimming career aside for a more "normal" lifestyle I have picked up triathlon and last year I completed my first Iron Man. My current goal is to become a better runner!
